Homecoming

I was gone for more than two weeks.  I was gone and there seemed to be no way to get me back.  My mind was in a hellish place and the lie that became an obsession was that I shouldn’t be here anymore, that the only solution to save me and others from my pain […]

Last Resort

Today marks the anniversary of an experience I never wish to repeat.  The earth was in full mode of Spring: beautiful pink blossoms on my tree out back, flowers gorgeously blooming, grass picturesquely green.  The beauty seemed to mock the inner storm in which I was caught: I was barely functioning.  I lay under the […]

Hope for the Year

A year ago I was sinking in the quicksand of self harm.  I was cutting every day, multiple times a day.  I couldn’t stop.  Around the turn of the year I sat on the kitchen floor after I had gotten the kids in bed and just . . . . tore at myself.  I barely […]

The Bridge and the Chasm

Not an easy month: two weeks ago an overwhelming darkness threatened to consume me. Running through my mind over and over were thoughts of how to end my life. The thoughts were in an endless loop and they came suddenly, without a trigger. I was completely blindsided. They came during a sweet, peaceful time that […]